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Mother,they are part of her.
bonding with another? yes,of course,anyone bonds with someone they have to live with,work with etc.That doesn't replace the only true,lasting bond.That of a Mother and Child.

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Originally Posted By Faith

How would you describe your bond to your adopted family?????

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I would discribe my bond as secure....loving......honest....love..........

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Though you may feel insure at time, do understand that once your baby is in your loving arms, all this will wash away! Hang in there, there IS a baby out there for you!

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Originally Posted By sandra

The bond between Mother and child does not wash away.It last forever.No one can replace it take it away.
sandra
www.chsadoption.com

[MissieMouse]

What do I think of bonding? Well, I feel that it is something that should take place whether the child being adopted is an infant or a toddler or even an older child. I think that bonding is very important and because I did not bond with my adoptive mother and father, I got the raw end of the deal. I think that bonding is the key to being happy...to feeling love, needed, cherished, and most of all, wanted.

Hi! I'm an adoptee. I'm 22 years old now and was adopted when I was 2 years 4 months old. I never bonded with my adoptive parents and I think that this is where I first started going down the screwed up road. I blame the system. I blame the system because I feel that they (DSHS, Lutheran Social Services, the State of Washington) should have protected me and helped me. I feel that, especially with an older child, that the state should provide counseling for that child and his/her new parents to help eachother integrate. I did not receive that...(which is why, as soon as I can, I'm going to sue the state of Washington for their neglect).

I was born in September of 1980. At 6 weeks old (I had bruises all over my body), I was placed in a foster home. At a few months old, I was given back to my birth parents. At 8 months old (after my biological mother twisted and broke my leg), I was taken away again and placed in foster care. At 10 months, I was then placed back into my biological parents care. (STUPID STUPID STUPID)! Shortly thereafter, my infant brother was born (http://www.scribblescorner.com/jonathan), and then he was killed at the hands of my biological mother. I was then taken away permenantly and placed back into the same foster care home as I was previously. I would stay at that foster home until my adoption was final.

I was able to bond with my foster mother and father. I think I was young enough to not remember or to easily forget, but whatever the case, I learned to trust them... When I was 2 years 4 months old, I was adopted. I never integrated with my new family. Shame on the state for not stepping in to offer assistance and counseling to integrate our family.

Anyway, I feel it is a necessity for your family to bond when a new adoptee is entering the picture. If you feel it's not going right...do everything in your power to get the help that is needed to get your family to integrate and the bonding to happen.

That's my thought on bonding...or the lack thereof.

Sincerely,
MissieMouse

[BettyPsych]

I think it is very simple. If you love the child, they will know beyond a shadow of a doubt. If you don't, they will know beyond a shadow of a doubt.