[mandiedandie]

So my husband and I have been calling around to different agencies today and two we have talked to are in the $30,000-40,000 range which is WAY higher than we can afford. One agency even had the audacity to say that we should each get two jobs to save up the money if we really want it. I really didn't appreciate that. Anyways, my question is: Is this price range really the norm?? Or is this outrageously high? We are also limited by my age (I'll be 22 in a few months but my husband is 27 and we've been married three years this month). If ANYONE has ANY information on agencies that are more around $12,000-20,000 or lower or agencies that are willing to work with my age range, please PM me. I've been tirelessly searching for agencies online but have hit a wall. I'm kind of heartbroken right now because with the above mentioned high price range we just won't be able to afford it...even with the tax credit. Thanks

[mrskt]

DH and I are approved and waiting with a domestic newborn program that has a sliding scale fee based on income. We were in the same boat and have found this program to be very reasonable. There are 2 different programs within the agency, one agency-directed that is Caucasian, and one that is AA and Biracial that is less expensive as an enticement. Feel free to PM me if you would like more information.

Katy
"Approved and Waiting" as of 9-27-07

[Vogi2002]

Keep looking!! Please don't let them make you think this is the norm. I had an agency tell me the same thing (BLECK). You WILL find one, take out the phone book. Start calling around!! That's how I found our agency, which was about 18500 and you don't pay bmom expenses (it's rolled in).

Good luck!! I was right there (and even wrote a post on the General Adoptive Parents board just now LOL)

[mandiedandie]

Thanks for your advice...I did pull out the phone book, it listed a whopping 6 agencies and none of them will work with us since I am almost 22.

[Vogi2002]

Hmmmm have you asked around? Post a thread on here with your state and ask for good agency recomendations.

I'm trying to think of what else I did...if you find a small agency somewherer you can post your profile on parentprofiles.com and hope to get a call that way also.

I'm so sorry, it's so stressful I know...especially with the age thing also. Look at agencies in all states, and on the internet. Just start calling and calling and calling

(((hugs))) 30 - 40,000 is ridiculous. Utterly ridiculous.

[mandiedandie]

I will post asking for recommendations..thank you. How do you deal with the dissapointment though? Calling and being rejected or hearing those outraegous numbers just make me feel so...sad.

[Vogi2002]

Well sometimes I got offended...especially if they made you feel stupid or less worthy (which many do). I told one agency how much we made and they said we would have to do foster because we didn't make enough for any agency to approve us (at the time we made around 60 to 75,000 a year!! WTH??)

Anyways, I started to get really down thinking I would NEVER find an agency. I wasn't willing to pay for a lot of expenses and lose them...I also wasn't able to pay for anything over 20,000. At the time dh still wasn't sure about adopting transracially either...which if you ARE open to many of the agencies will accept you regardless of age because they need couples all the time.

But anyways, just remember that there ARE agencies out there. You aren't crazy, you will be a good mom, and you are NOT too young. I had to tell myself over and over that only I know when I'm ready to be a mom. And boy was I ever ready....

Feel free to PM me if you want to talk also...the rejection is hard....I get sad...but then I get mad! LOL

[BuckarooBanzai]

Both of our adoption were under the $15K mark. The agency we are currently working with has a sliding scale and due to our income the next one should max out at $17K (if not a state child).

We have worked with 2 different agencies in AZ for domestic adoptions. PM me and I will see if I can help.

[nikkianni]

We just submitted our request for finalization to the courts and the final cost of our adoption was less than $9,000. That's with agency fees, legal fees, mileage for visits and several months on parent profiles. We were lucky not to have any birthparent expenses.
You CAN find an agency that fits you. Don't give up. Keep asking around. Word of mouth is how we found our agency. We also knew going in that we couldn't afford one of the big agencies so we went small. It meant less exposure and more legwork, but the price was right.
I know it can get discouraging. Contrary to popular belief, adoption is a rough road. We're all here to help any way we can.

[mrskt]

I know you PM'ed me about our agency, and then saw that the agency-directed program requires you to be 24... did you notice that in the AA and Biracial program, the wording is "generally 24 years old". PP is correct, often the AA/Biracial programs are more willing to consider making exceptions if everything else is in line. If you are open to Biracial or AA, I would still consider speaking with them and seeing what the possibilities would be...

Katy

[kabubakat]

Hi.. I thought I had done good reasearch about agencies until I joined this community. I am very happy with our agency which is Florida..We are i PA. Our agency fees are around 14,000. Then you have your other expenses (attorney, homestudy, birthmother expenses) we will have about 22,000-25,000 into it by the end. It seems though that there are agencies that are way less, but I did not see any of those when I reasearced. I also like our agency because they keep a small witing family caseload 12-15 families waiting at a time. I don't think there are age restrictions either. Have you considered fostering? Someone may have suggested that already I haven't read all the replies... goodluck

[zempagirl]

Hi our adoption total csot was around $17,000 total (including lawyers fees for finalizing and legalizing the contact agreement) Our agency also had a sliding fee schedule for part of the adoption. My aganecy is Children's Home Society and Family Services in MN. What state are you in? Good luck.

Deb

[mandiedandie]

Hey everyone, thank you for all of your HELPFUL!! replies. Your encouragement helped us to keep looking and we finally found an agency that is perfect for us. They are based in Phoenix (we live in Yuma, which is about 180 miles away) and have worked with Yuma couples before, they offer a military discount on everything except the agency fees, so we will save almost $700-$800 with that, their agency fees are $14,000 (7,000 is due when you are selected and the other 7,000 is due upon placement) and if the adoption is interrupted, they refund you 2500 up front and the remainder of the agency fee you paid will be used towards a subsequent adoption. They are also with the BBB, have a great record, will be HAGUE certified, are non-profit...AND THEY WILL WORK WITH ME BASED ON MY AGE!!!! Currently they only have 5 waiting families, so our chances are pretty good. We're really excited and our fees will probably total around $17,000 not including attorney fees. The company my husband works for offers Group Legal and in June, which is open enrollment, we will have an attorney in Phoenix without having to pay any fees except the $14/per month to be under the group legal plan and then the extras like postage, mileage, and court fees. So we are scrambling to pay stuff off and save up as much as we can right now...we just paid off my car and are working on paying off his truck and saving up towards the "baby fund" as we do it. We will start out homestudy in March with them in and hopefully be in the "pool" of waiting families by June which is perfect timing for our legal plan to kick in. So THANK YOU so much to everyone for your help and advice, we so greatly appreciate it!

[kamari]

Thank you so much for posting your update! We've always planned on adopting, but only just started the serious research and the costs have been causing me to seriously doubt whether this was even an option for us. Reading your post has given me hope!

[nycfsa]

That's great that you found an agency to work with you. Are you sure that your group legal plan will cover the attorney? We also have a group legal plan thru my husband's work and there are no participating adoption attorneys. Apparently the reimbursement the plan gives to attorneys is not much, so it only ends up being useful for having wills drawn up and small things like that (although we did get two wills and a new deed to our house for free thru the plan).

If your plan covers your adoption attorney, then that's great, you're very lucky. Just be sure that's the case so you're not disappointed.