[webweave]

Hello,
Below are some ways to avoid adoption scams; are there other ways that are not listed...or experiences you have had with scammers and how do you handle them?

Adoption Scams...how to avoid them!
Here are some simple suggestions from my friend Courtney Frey, a birthmother, about avoiding scams:
1.) Use 1-800 numbers on your websites, or list your attorney's or agencies number. This will protect you from anyone finding out where you live. It will also keep most scam artists from contacting you. They don't want to talk to an attorney.

2.) Be leery when you are approached via e-mail or through a chat room.

* Do not go into a chatroom and write, "I am looking for a birthmother." Or, "Are there any expecting girls in here?" This is like standing on a street corner holding wads of cash out. Scammers will see that and jump on it. If a potential birthmother is honestly looking for potential adoptive parents she is most likely going to use major adoption sites. She is less likely to search via chat rooms.

* via e-mail: warning signs: Receiving pictures right away. E-mails consisting of "hard times" (for example, my car just broke down, I have no where to live, my boyfriend just left me etc.) Asking for your phone number right away.

3.) NEVER send money.

4.) Once you have been contacted, network with others in the adoption community. Tell them about the person who has contacted you, share your stories. The on-line community is actually quite close and if you use each other to keep an eye out, you're more likely to be safe. Just recently a scam artist was caught this way.

5.) Make sure you are represented by a reliable agency, attorney or facilitator. Get your agency or your attorney involved as quickly as possible. If you have been contacted and feel that the woman is serious, tell your agency/attorney all the information you have. Ask the potential birthmother to get in contact with the agency/attorney. Do this before you spend hundreds of dollars on phone bills, or invest in planning anything.

The best way to avoid being scammed once contact has been secured and the agency/attorney is involved is actually quite simple. Communication. As early as possible the potential birthmother should be getting counseling and support. Don't let her wait until she is eight months pregnant before she looks at and understands all her options. If she hasn't had adequate support or information, and been given the opportunity to evaluate her choices, this might cause her to question herself when it gets close to the finalization. While this is the agencies responsibility, you must as well make sure for yourself, that this has happened. We are naive in thinking that she will not have second thoughts unless she's been prepared for what is to come.

[tobeafamily]

GREAT advice! Glad you put it out there. :-)

Regina, AMom to Ryan Joshua Thomas