[GoddessDanu]

Sorry for my ignorance, but at what age would you consider a child an "older" child? DH and I are considering adoption a child or sibling group with a max age of 5 years old. Would a 5 year old be considered an older child? Thanks!

[Singlemom619]

For some people 4 is considered an "older" child.... Basically once they're not toddlers anymore....

I think 8 is a more common "older child" age... and the teen years even more so.

[TxMom65]

I would have to check but I think Texas considers an older child to be 6 to recieve the subsidy.

[MilehighDad]

This is definitely a matter of opinion, but there are some significant legal definitions as well. In particular, a special needs foster child is defined by the federal government this way:

The state has determined that the child will not be adopted unless assistance is provided to the adoptive parents. Factors used by states to make this determination include:
The child's ethnic background and age,
Whether the child is a member of a minority or sibling group, and
Whether the child has a medical condition or a physical, mental, or emotional handicap

Because of this guideline, most states set a certain age where kids are considered special needs, and often this is what they refer to as an "older child". In many states, this age is 9, however in Los Angeles county, CA, all foster kids up for adoption are designated as special needs. This is important because you can take the adoption tax credit even if you have no expenses if the child is special needs.

However, in the international adoption community, age 4 or 5 is usually considered an "older child". This is because significant emotional and developmental issues can be seen when raising kids in this age range, so the parenting experience may have more in common with older adoptions than infants.

According to our therapist, who has specialized in helping traumatized children, age 4-11 is much the same category. They are young enough to be reached and lead normal adult lives but can be very, very challenging. After age 12, limited results should be expected and their adult lives may be very hard because many of their challenges may not be overcome. Before age four, they should be less challenging as long as the parents respect their trauma histories and form a trusting bond with them.

Good luck!

[mrsred]

Are you asking for a legal definition? As you can see, that can vary from state to state. But my personal definition is over three. The difference between an older child adoption and a traditional adoption is that the "older" child will be very much aware of what is going on, and will most likely have sme sort of behavioral fall out. Three year olds are generally old enough to have some comprehnsion as to what is going on, and will even remember most of it.

[GoddessDanu]

Thank you for the information!