Members List Photos Events Local Adoption Support Search Arcade Reviews Membership Upgrade
Welcome to the Forums. Register
If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ. You may have to register before you can post or search: click here to proceed. To start viewing messages, select a forum below that you would like to view or click View All of Todays Posts.
Forum Categories
User Name
Password

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
  #16  
Old 04-21-2008, 07:49 AM
nickchris's Avatar
nickchris nickchris is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 388
Total Points: 7,619.38
Donate
For what reason? are you asking a question in regards to your child? or are you having a linguistic debate? Asking for sources, based on your OP, makes no sense.


Quote:
Originally Posted by marcav
Sources please.

Last edited by nickchris : 04-21-2008 at 08:26 AM.
Reply With Quote
Adoption Information
Become an adoption forums premium member to enjoy these Membership Benefits:
  • Remove Advertising
  • Unlimited Arcade
  • Unlimited Attachments
  • Increased PM Storage
  • Calendar Posting
  • Larger Avatars
  • Personal Page
  • Just $19.95 / yr!
Rex & Jennifer (NV)
are hoping to adopt
Rex & Jennifer hoping to adopt A Service of Adoption Profiles

  #17  
Old 04-21-2008, 08:10 AM
Sleeplvr's Avatar
Sleeplvr Sleeplvr is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Sep 2004
Posts: 878
Total Points: 5,185.13
Donate
If you teach your child Ebonics to fit in with the black community it will backfire on you. It will be seen as disrespectful and condescending. They will be puzzled as to why someone who comes from a middle class background would speak in that manner.

If you truly wish your child to be comfortable with AA's in general the goal should be making the child comfortable in his/her skin and comfortable around other AA's.... speaking Ebonics is not a good tool for making a child comfortable with AA’s. It will end up alienating the child more than anything.

Ebonics does not equal AA culture.

Last edited by Sleeplvr : 04-21-2008 at 08:14 AM.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 04-21-2008, 08:53 AM
Scatterbrain Scatterbrain is offline
Banned
Join Date: Feb 2008
Posts: 240
Total Points: 6,984.99
Donate
What kind of sources are you looking for exactly? You have women from different parts of the country saying "I am AA and I am offended." Yet, you believe your study has higher value than their experiences????

If you want your child to have AA role models I am quite certain you will find many upstanding citizens in your own community.
Reply With Quote
  #19  
Old 04-21-2008, 11:49 AM
marcav marcav is offline
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 129
Total Points: 6,255.16
Donate
Okay, let me again repeat what I am trying to convey, and apparently not doing such a great job.

1. AAVE is a linguistically recognized dialect. This is not my opinion, it is supported by the field of linguistics, most notably by the African American scholar John Rickford. I had asked before that if there was a contrary view in the linguistic field I would like it sourced for my own education. I have sourced my information, and expect the same courtesy instead of simply being flamed.

2. My son is not "picking this up from his peer group" (his peers are only 2 years old and can barely speak themselves for heavens sake), but he is learning it from hearing the day care staff speak.

3. I am not trying to teach my son AAVE to fit in; I haven't a clue as to how to speak it, even if I wanted to. My research simply points out that there is abundant evidence that indicates when AAVE is accepted as a parallel dialect to compare with standard English, children overwhelmingly learn standard English better and faster. In other words, shame based teaching isn't such a great way to teach (what a suprise.) I know my son is going to speak standard English because he lives with me. I just don't happen to think its a crime if he learns AAV along the way, and that there are probably some advantages to it. If he learns/uses it fine. If he doesn't, fine. The only reason I brought it up is because the options I have are: a)correct him when he does it, b) don't correct him, c) pull him out of the day care he is in and put him in one where he is exposed to standard English only.

So again, if you don't have sources then we will simply have to agree to disagree.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
Old 04-21-2008, 12:27 PM
nickchris's Avatar
nickchris nickchris is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 388
Total Points: 7,619.38
Donate
One thing about trans-racial adoption is this; one theory or opinion does not equal AA culture, or any another minorities culture. The Ebonics theory was refuted by many Blacks because we know better than to push the overall recognition of improper speech if we want to succeed, and decrease the ingrained negative views of Blacks period. Blacks deal with negative views most of their lives. I hope you do realize that certain debates are best left among the Black community.
The same way I teach my kids to respect other races/cultures ie; do not call the person Chinese, if you do not know which country they are from, please use Asian. Respect the reasons behind what is being relayed to you; this will be considered disrespectful if you speak this theory among the AA population.
I provided a link in my original post.

Last edited by nickchris : 04-21-2008 at 12:39 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #21  
Old 04-21-2008, 12:32 PM
musemoon's Avatar
musemoon musemoon is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2005
Posts: 468
Total Points: 9,102.12
Donate
I'm white, from the OC which grew it's linguistic roots, from "The Valley" OMYGOD! TOTALLY, NO WAY, That's so RADACAJZH....are expressions of elation.

While, during my up bringing it was imparative to know these words...each culture of rising agst ridded teens create an entirely new set of words and phrases that comprise their very own speech.

However, that being said....all of my black friends speak beautifully, with perfect grammar, some are writers as I am and can definitely toss around the slang. But we speak like adults, when we are not goofing off.

My child will be taught to speak with proper English and I will correct her if proper English is not being used in our home as any mother would correct their child for using improper English...because it is our job to support the education of our children.

While Ebonics may be a registered dialect, all of my friends (I guess I should say black friends, but I absolutly hate saying...my black friend, my Asian friend...blah blah blah, they're just friends) are very far removed from a culture where Ebonics (like any other regional dialect) is used, and as it is not the mainstream dialect, a parent should endorse proper English in the home. HOWEVER....if your child (and mine) adopts a childhood, community, peer group inspired slang to fit in and be so uber "phat", "Fo schizzle baby," "it's all drip". It should be a way of bonding with their peers and not a regular mode of speech.

Either way we're probably gonna need an updated dictionary.
__________________
Forum Journal "Aria's Adoption Journal" and my blog at http://museandthemoon.wordpress.com/

and Elona of the Great Green (a children's book about adoption and fairies :-) is here http://musemommie.today.com/

11/30/05 Certified Fost/adopt parent
2/15/06 Placed with a beautiful newborn baby girl
11/09/06 TPR
5/1/07 FINALIZED!!!!
07/08 going back on the list to adopt again...





Last edited by musemoon : 04-21-2008 at 12:44 PM.
Reply With Quote
  #22  
Old 04-21-2008, 12:50 PM
BethanyB's Avatar
BethanyB BethanyB is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2004
Posts: 921
Total Points: 11,517.03
Donate
Marcav, what I don't think you understand is that just because some guy did research and made up something called ebonics does mean all AA people agree with it.

Now I can see if your child was in a school where ebonics was being taught, your assumption that he is learning "ebonics" would not have been so offensive.

When I am at home or talking with friends I have been known to say, "Where's it at?" I'm a middle class white girl. It is the fact that you assumed he is speaking ebonics because you assume he got that phrase from a black person. Not all black people speak ebonics.

I tend to disagree with the whole ebonics theory but let's just put that aside.

I agree with the rest of the folks who say that if you are a middle class person who is educated your child should not be learning poor grammar (in your eyes ebonics.) It's important to speak proper english and then when your child is a teenager he can pick up slang like very other child of any color in the country.

You mentioned having many black friends and coworkers. I'm wondering why you have not asked them these questions? Have they not been able to help you with this?
__________________
Mommy to T (A gorgeous 3 year old boy!)

And Mommy to M (A beautiful 2 year old girl!)

Be the Change You Want to See in the World
Reply With Quote
  #23  
Old 04-21-2008, 01:18 PM
Kelli's Avatar
Kelli Kelli is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Oct 2002
Posts: 898
Total Points: 3,841.61
Donate
marcav, I'm not trying to flame you but I really don't understand what kind of sources you think are better then some of the ones you're getting here from educated and intelligent black women with children. By saying this I certainly don't mean to discount anyone else's opinion here. I like to think of myself as one as well, and I can tell you without a doubt that I am teaching my daugher to speak only proper English the same way my parents taught me and my siblings. If my dd slips with the grammar, I correct her every time. As a matter of fact when she used to say "where is it at?" (as I think most kids do regardless of race when they are learning to speak) my response would be "there is no at and it's right after the is" meaning whatever she is looking for is after the 'is' because a word must always follow.

I don't understand why you're pulling out this research that shows by some accounts that it is an acceptable dialect in today's society. One can find research to support just about any position these days so to me personally that proves very little. Let's just say for arguments sake that it is "acceptable" by some. I'd still rather my daughter speak and learn the language that is accepted at Havard, the boardroom, and beyond KWIM? Nothing less.

In regards to #3 -

Quote:
Originally Posted by marcav
Okay, let me again repeat what I am trying to convey, and apparently not doing such a great job.


3. I am not trying to teach my son AAVE to fit in; I haven't a clue as to how to speak it, even if I wanted to. My research simply points out that there is abundant evidence that indicates when AAVE is accepted as a parallel dialect to compare with standard English, children overwhelmingly learn standard English better and faster. In other words, shame based teaching isn't such a great way to teach (what a suprise.) I know my son is going to speak standard English because he lives with me. I just don't happen to think its a crime if he learns AAV along the way, and that there are probably some advantages to it.

If the assumption of a learned and accepted parallel dialect is to help learn proper English better and faster why is this not so for white children? That in itself is insulting. The conclusion has been made by someone that somehow my intelligent and beautiful daughter would speak better English and learn faster if we as black parents accepted broken English because our child is black. We should accept the type of English that will not open every door for her in this society, and that we are somehow "shaming" her by teaching her the proper way to speak. Not to compare them but she might pick ebonics up along the way the same way ALL people tend to pick stuff like slang and foul language up along the way, but the key is to know, and to be taught what is right and wrong and act accordingly. She's of course been exposed to people that don't speak proper English and has probably overheard mommy not speaking properly as well, but she's been exposed to people that smoke too, and I wouldn't encourage her to do that either. Exposure in and of itself is not an acceptable excuse for forming bad habits in my book either.

I could go on here but to sum it up, my opinion is that you should just stick to teaching your child proper English and leave the other stuff alone.
__________________
You don't choose your family. They are God's gift to you, as you are to them.
-Bishop Desmond Tutu-

Last edited by Kelli : 04-21-2008 at 01:43 PM.
Reply With Quote
Adopt Help Adopt Help
Want to Adopt? Click here
Adopt Help
Pregnant? Click here

  #24  
Old 04-21-2008, 01:18 PM
marcav marcav is offline
Member
Join Date: Nov 2004
Posts: 129
Total Points: 6,255.16
Donate
Quote:
The Ebonics theory was refuted by many Blacks because we know better than to push the overall recognition of improper speech if we want to succeed, and decrease the ingrained negative views of Blacks period. Blacks deal with negative views most of their lives. I hope you do realize that certain debates are best left among the Black community

Okay, fair enough, and I understand the political & cultural reasons behind that. One of the reasons I brought it up is for the very reason these things aren't discussed. I was not trying to be provocative, I was just trying to honestly understand why it is shame based. That being said, I will say no more.
Reply With Quote
  #25  
Old 04-21-2008, 01:44 PM
nickchris's Avatar
nickchris nickchris is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 388
Total Points: 7,619.38
Donate
Perhaps if you placed your views in another context, it would be a good platform for a conversation. I get the aspect, on being culturally competent, as in, what is the child's home/neighborhood environment. An urban child may not understand certain questions, because said child was not exposed to the particular subject, or item. It could be said for a child from a remote rural area too.
That does not mean that improper speech should be viewed as a norm. If you are speaking about culturally competent teaching to children in urban areas, or even say the Appalachian communities, or children of recent immigrants, I think there are other ways to approach the children. Poverty, and class levels are issues/factors that affect all races.
Otherwise, I find that theory is just that, but the application or in this case, discussing such views with varied people of color, is always best.

Last edited by nickchris : 04-21-2008 at 02:03 PM.
Reply With Quote
Ready for Adoption?
Adoption Network Law Center
Adoption Network Law Center
Want to Adopt? Click here.
Click here to be helped in California!
Adoption Network Law Center
Pregnant? Click here.
Adoption Network Law Center
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

Points Per Thread View: 1.00
Points Per Thread: 15.00
Points Per Reply: 5.00


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:03 PM.


Ready for Adoption?
Adoption Network Law Center
Adoption Network Law Center
Want to Adopt? Click here.
Click here to be helped in California!
Adoption Network Law Center
Pregnant? Click here.
Adoption Network Law Center