[Betty Lou]

Is there anyone who could help with Missouri adoptions? I have conflicting stories on the laws there. I was adopted through the Chidren's Home Society of Missouri. They can give me non-ide. info. but have to go to court for files to be opened and then pay someone in their office to do the searching. I really need some real facts. Thank-You Val

[kmmoore]

Hi Val

I was also adopted in Missouri. I petitioned the court for non-identifying information and needed a signed affidavit from my adoptive mother (adoptive father deceased) before they would open the records for this information. In my case the adoption was private and not handled through an agency so there was no information they could give me because there wasn't any. The only information in my records was the name and age of the birthmother so I had to hire a court approved social worker and the court gave her my birthmother's name after receiving a litter from me requesting they do so. It is my understanding that if you were adopted through an agency they could contact birthparents to see if they would like contact with you or at least give you more information on your birth and background. I am now waiting to hear from the searcher. I wrote a letter to my birthmother that she will read to her if she is able to find her. I am not requesting a meeting but would like family medical history and other information. I guess I really would like to see a picture to see what she looks like also. But I doubt that will happen. I have waited so long to start this search I am afraid it is too late. My birthdate is 4-4-47. If you would like to email me at kmmoore47@yahoo.com please feel free. Good luck to you.

[ayjones]

I to am adopted in MO (st louis) and i sent a letter to the Family court asking them to look for my birth familyand they called me and told me that they were sending my info to the agency that adopted me and that i would hear from them with in the week. And i did and she said that as we were speaking she was putting togeather the non-identifying and would put it in the mail the next day. In order to get identifying info my adopted mom had to sign and notarize the paper that the caseworker was sending her. Which she did so we (adopted mom and myself) are waiting to hear back from the case worker on if my birth mom wants to meet us. IT's only been two weeks so i have 2 months and 2 wks. I never heard that you have to g to court just to get the non-itentifying info. Well good luck to all.

[Betty Lou]

Kmmoore and Miss Jones, Thank you for responding to my post. The agency that the adoption took place will give me the non-identfiying information. They say I have to have a judge open the sealed records for identifing information.Then they have a person that will do the search for around 400 dollars. Depending how long it takes. I already have a name, but who knows what it is after 42 years. By looking at our birth dates we have around 12 to 14 years between our adoptions and things have not changed on getting infotmation we need. I live in Nebraska and gave a daughter up in 1977. When the adoptee turns 25 they can reguest information from Vital Statistics if the b-mom has provided it. I found her on the site adoption registry, But both of us were waiting for her to turn 25 to do the other. I had the paper work all ready to sent in. I am planning a trip this spring to go to St.Louis for a week and see what I can come up with. Good Luck in both of of your searches and peace be with you. Val

[Search Angel]

hi i know of a missouri search angel who hangs out at this site below ,shes really nice, and will help you for free as much as she can...just post on the general message board, and she'll help you.

Search Angels

[sgriesbach]

I am looking for my birthparents and as far as I know it was a private adoption handled in Missouri, I'm not sure where I was actually born but I was brought to Jackson County Memorial Hospital in kansas City, Missouri where I was adopted approx. 3 months later. My adopted mother tells me my birth mothers father was a surgeon and she was attending college and her father insisted she put me up for adoption. My birth date is March 30, 1960 and my name is James Ronald Griesbach. I am interested in my medical history and more if possible I am married with four sons and live in North Missouri. If anyone can shed some light I am really having a hard time getting started and I'm really not sure of laws/etc. Would appreciate any help offered. Thank you and God Bless.

[karbrown77]

If the adoption was done privately your adoption would still have to be finalized by the court system in MO. My agency could not find my non-id or records and I had to go through the county courts. I would check the juvenile courts at the county where you were born and see if they can't find your file, non-id and information. If you need any other input please feel free to contact me.
Karen Brown-Belanger
8/24/59 Springfield, MO

[kgoldin]

I was adopted in Joplin, MO and born in Carthage, MO (Both in Jasper County). When I wanted my non-identifying information at the age of 29, both adoptive parents had to sign a release. I was then told that in order to find my mother, I would have to file a request with the court and convince a judge to do a search. If convinced, they would then search for my birth mother, and if found, they would contact her, in person only, and ask if she wanted any contact with me. (Can you imagine a stranger coming to your house and dropping that on you?) Needless to say, I couldn't do that to anyone.
Jasper County is supposed to be one of the strictest counties in one of the strictest states (Missouri) when dealing with birth records. This is not very enlightening, nor encouraging, information, but I am sharing it if it helps anyone searching in Missouri.
By the way, my DOB is 4/6/69, female, and adopted through an agency (never found out the name) 4 months after birth.
I wish you all the best of luck in your search.

[kgoldin]

I was adopted in Joplin, MO and born in Carthage, MO (Both in Jasper County). When I wanted my non-identifying information at the age of 29, both adoptive parents had to sign a release. I was then told that in order to find my mother, I would have to file a request with the court and convince a judge to do a search. If convinced, they would then search for my birth mother, and if found, they would contact her, in person only, and ask if she wanted any contact with me. (Can you imagine a stranger coming to your house and dropping that on you?) Needless to say, I couldn't do that to anyone.
Jasper County is supposed to be one of the strictest counties in one of the strictest states (Missouri) when dealing with birth records. This is not very enlightening, nor encouraging, information, but I am sharing it if it helps anyone searching in Missouri.
By the way, my DOB is 4/6/69, female, and adopted through an agency (never found out the name) 4 months after birth.
I wish you all the best of luck in your search.

[karbrown77]

"(Can you imagine a stranger coming to your house and dropping that on you?) "

Well, I don't think in reality our birthfamilies are strangers because they are our blood ties. So, that's my humble opinion. I got a beautiful letter from my birthmother telling me all about "me" it was the most amazing thing that happened to me. Just to know that I was not the misfit I thought I was. I was like other people. Even though I am still a secret and she can't tell anyone about me yet, I was healed so much by communicating with her.

Plus, I have suffered from rare hereditary diseases and have lost my life to being undiagnosed, misdiagnosed by doctors. It was no kind of life. After being abused (severely) by my apars (they had a bio child I wasn't needed after that just made to feel like a huge burden to them). With no family, and no health, it's a nightmare living like I have had to live in the places I have had to live.

It is a personal issue to search. Now, this is just my opinion. Time goes by, people pass away. You could miss our on important medical information for your family, for your children, and their children if you have them. It's up to you though and I respect whatever decision you make. I think we all have to be respectful of decisions made in adoption search.
I wish you the best,
Karen

[radiodoll]

Hi gang - I don't have my full file with me today, but.....here's the dish.

The STATE of MO served as its own ADOPTION AGENCY when we were born. This means several things. One - you have a birth certifucate with MINIMAL info registered in your county office. TWO - you have a FULL certificate held in the files at Jefferson City, through the Dept of Family Services. Make sure you purchase copies of BOTH certificates. it can be done on the phone with a cred card and will cost 10 or 15 dollars.

Once you get these both, compare them closely. There may be leads there.

THEN call the Dept of Family Services in Jefferson City and ask to speak with the adoption specialist - Rosalee Schottel. She does it by the book, but if you are NICE and not pushy, but honest and personable with her, she can be easier to work with. Build a relationship with her.

Then ask her what documents you need to present to her for your non-identifying info. It will cost you $50.00.

Sometimes, little "slips" or gifts from God appear on this non-id stuff. Sometimes not. But you can start to play CSI a little.
In one place, my bmom's first name was missed so I now know it.
There were conflicting stories from what my mok was originally told and what the documents were hinting at.

I continued to call Rosalee and do a lot of questioning. Through a process of illimination, I got it down to 2 states where my bmom could have been from. There are more leads in the paperwork.

THEN I had by adoptive parents complete a request to allow me to continue the search, the had toi waive their rights to anonymity, and so did I. I filed this through Rosalee. Now, If my bmom goes to the court thay can automatically open my file for her.

NEXT I am selecting a court certified investigator (CI) from 3 recommended for MO. I am checking their background and discussing fees and contracts with them and getting a "Feel" for who they are. There are some pople I don't want to approach wiht because it might scare her off.

I will pay a fee for this person ( 250 0r 325) to FIND here and relay that I wish to give her a letter (non-identifying) to explain why I am contacting her and what I want. She can either accpet the letter, refuse the letter, or accept the letter, read it and refuse me anyway. There are no guarantees of contact or even letter acceptance. it's then a done deal.

Why would I gamble this amount of money? Well, I can tell you htat MO is under a barage of lesgislation to open adoption files. Since they ahve been the state with THE LARGEST NUMBER OF ADOPTEES, sooner or later it's going to pass.

When it does, all of the updated infor that the CI has found will be there for me and all I'll have to do is follwo the last leg through. So I am paying them to update the information of where my Bfamily is to date. That's pretty important. You could look at it as an investment. Whatever.

That's what I've decided to do. I am at a dead end with the rest of my leads. I had some good ones, and have made some head way (alot actually) but its time to get help.

You are welcome to contact me through the site and I will get you Rosalee's Phone number adn the addresses you need.

Good Luck-

Radiodoll
born 8-3-55 at The Willows in Kansas City MO

[karbrown77]

"NEXT I am selecting a court certified investigator (CI) from 3 recommended for MO. I am checking their background and discussing fees and contracts with them and getting a "Feel" for who they are. There are some pople I don't want to approach wiht because it might scare her off."

RD,
Ok, question (I Co-Mod a Missouri search and support list so I am interested in Missouri of late with the adoption system overhaul factoring in) you got to choose your CI? Through Jackson county court and Rosalee Shottel?

I am a Greene county adoptee, and since the DFS couldn't find my file twice no less (duh) I had to go to the courts. I did not get to pick a CI one was appointed to me, BUT, I'm not sure if it was because of my bad health but there was no charge.

They found my birthmother and I got to receive non-id letters but since I was a secret child (shhhhhh) and bmom was sent out of state and she couldn't come forward to sign ID release forms (they couldn't find bfather too many different spelled "german" names I was told) I have no names, no cities, or no states to go on. SO, I know I am rambling here, but I am interested in knowing all I can about Missouri adoptions and the change in status quo. I had a CI change in midstream of my "find" through the courts and everything went downhill when this new "woman" stepped into my "reunion". She has told other adoptees I have sent to get their information that "these birthmothers have gone on with their lives and don't want to be found." Yeah, nice lady whose name I won't mention unless someone wants to email me privately.

Hmmmmmm makes me wonder. But yes, an investment, makes sense to me if you are at brick walls and have nothing to go on.

Can I pass this information along to my list?
Thanks,
Karen
8/24/59 Springfield, MO

[Lucky]

I was referred to Roselee by a friend. I contacted her, and unfortunately, she was unable to find any informaiton that I was adopted.

I have gone through Judges, Attorneys, and the court houses, with no luck. My relatives know but will not help at all. They say it is the past and that it is none of my business. The only information I have is from one of my birth certificates. The bottom is cut off and only shows the initals of one birth parnet. It also shows that I have 2 siblings. I was an only child, so this was wonderful to find out.

I contacted Vital Statitics in Jefferson City, MO., and was told that I would need to get a court order to receive this information. From what I understand, getting a court order for this would be very hard to do. Both of my adopted parents are deceased. I was also told that I would need a release from the adopted parents. They are both deceased. In this case there is nothing I can do.

But, I refuse to give up! Something has got to give. It has been over 15 years of searching. Any ideas?

Lucky

[radiodoll]

Lucky -

I was told that the state laws provide for death of adoptive parents. If they are deceased, you must provide copies of both death cetificates and as long as you are older than 21, and there is a file, it can be opened with the appropriate paperwork.

I would approach Rosalee again and have a heart to heart and she if she has an idea.
Of ourse, if you don't have a file at the state DFS, if might be assumed that it was an illegal transaction. There is a blackmarket search site for Missouri, but I will have to go back and locate the info for you. That would mean working with historians and search teams

The Kansas City Star newspaper has done a lot of past writing on the subject. You might find out more from the archives of the newspaper. It you could hook up with someone on the archives staff there, you might have some tips on where to begin.

More Late, when I can bring in my files - hang in there!


Radiodoll

[Lucky]

Thank you so much for responding. It would not surprise me if my adoption was done illegally, from the looks of my information. Also, considering my adopted father's occupation. Thanks again for the information. Lucky