[tawhite]

I am an adoptee looking for my bmom and having a hard time and really starting to question a lot of things. I dont know if this is the right place for this but I really need some encouragement and support please. If you are willing to talk please messge me. Thanks.

[Dickons]

Tawhite,

First off, welcome to the boards.

Find out the laws on adoption in the state you were born/adopted from.

Then start googling for internet sites like this one that have free registries (see tab titled reunite above). Post your search in each registry but keep track of the following:

1. Site address.

2. The contact details you provide, i.e. email address. If you change email addresses you must go back and update them as sometimes it takes years.

3. The exact info you post, this will help keep you safe from scammers if the only thing they provide is the info you provide, be leery and make them provide you with details that are relevant.

Search the same registries for potential matches. Sometimes memories fade and the date may be off, it may be a sibling or birth father that does not have exact info, sometimes things were changed deliberately depending on the era you were born in. Just take the time to be open to potentials and understand you can always confirm via an inexpensive dna test.

Submit your info to the ISRR (International Soundex Reunion Registry. They used to require that you mail in a form, not sure if you can now submit online or not. They will only contact you if they find a match.

Request your non-id. If an agency was involved request ALL info available. If you were a state adoption then ask them.

Talk to your parents to find out what they know and to reassure them that it is nothing they did, you are not going away, you will always be their child. Your parents will have insecurities, it is normal and natural. Be aware of it, do what you can to alleviate their fears, but still be true to what you need.

Start talking on the forums, join in the conversations so we can get to know you.

Kind regards,
Dickons

[tawhite]

All of that really helps thank you so much. I have been doing a lot of it but your advice is very appreciated and ver helpful. Thank you for responding.

[mommy12]

just wanted to wish you the best of luck finding your mom. im sure its really hard and i hope soon enough all your wuestions may get answered as to anything. other then that the only places i have been trying to look for my husbands father is through anything to do with the internet but this case is more complex since we really have no adoption records. my guess would be to go to the records and look up her name an birthdate on some of those websites . best of luck

[tawhite]

Thank you so much. The encouragement is appreciated. I hope everything works out with finding your husbands father. Best of luck to you!

[NanieB44]

I am a birthmom who successfully reunited with my daughter 20 years ago. We had both been looking, but I found her first.

You mention that you are starting to question alot of things. If you're more specific about what kinds of things, maybe I can be of some help.

Blessings!
NanieB