[kitkat582497]

Hi I don't know IF this is the right place to put this in here BUT I wanted to ask so Adoptees this... I'm Giving my baby up and my Bf and I our making a scrapedbook for her and WE want to know what kinda things if you could have asked you Birth mom and dad or things about them you would have liked to know...
Kathy

[FatBirdy]

Hi! There is another great thread about this.....I can't remember where it is...hopefully someone can post the link!!!

Basically.....EVERYTHING. I am an adult adoptee and knowing who my bparents were and especially what they looked like was top on my lists. PICTURES!!!!! Also list some favorites: foods, colors, music, smells. Perhaps after the birth write about that. Talk about your parents, your siblings - height, hair color, eye color, jobs, education, hobbies etc.

Since you are still prego maybe keep a journal - baby kicks and wiggles, maybe talk about the music you played for the baby.....??

Just some thoughts.

[Sammie86Sosa]

everything... maybe create a video... (if the aparents will let the baby have it) show them that you really love him/her and that it was for the best and in 18 years maybe look for me if ya want...

write about you and your history... your ancestary... pictures of when he/she was in the womp...

nothing is too small and nothing is too big to put into it... every fact is charished

[nugget]

Photos!! All sorts of photos!
Things I would have liked to ask my mom:
What was your favorite food? Drink? Sport? TV show? Movie? Song? Group? Color?
Maybe take a photo in your favorite outfit (knowing it will be out in a few years!!)
Do you like animals? What kind.
Really, there are a lot of deep questions I would have loved to ask her. But it's those little things that make me feel like I'm a part of her.
Example: She hated to cook.....as do I.
She loved Daisy's......as do I.

Don't worry about making the layout perfect. Just having it will be perfect enough!!
Best of luck and love to you and your family.
Wendy

[LadyBugz]

I agree with everyone else.

A few more ideas: be honest about why you are placing. What is going on in your life right now?

Family stories. What is your grandma called? Nana, Granny, Grans? (Or other people important in your life.) Do you have any special family traditions? If you aren't close to your family, why not?

How did you do in school? What did you like? If you didn't do well, why not? Be honest. If you skipped classes and didn't pay attention or if you were teacher's pet and loved it all.. say so.

What advice would you give? On your child's baptism/dedication, starting school, moving to junior high, moving to high school, first date, graduation, college, marriage, first child, etc? What about other situations like choosing friends, choosing a spouse, being faced with drugs, learning to drive?

What are some stories of your childhood-present day? Did you TP a neighbor's house? Have a memorable slumber party? Play any sports? Something fun.

How do you handle adversary?

How do you handle pressure?

What do you do best? (Work with your hands, think abstractly, show compassion, be logical, etc?) What do you have the most difficulty with?

What are your pet peeves?

What Myers-Briggs personality types are you? (You can see online for free, but I'm not sure where.)

What size shoes do you wear?

What quirky habits or interests do you have? Do you stay up all night reading, or like to get up at 5 AM, or swim in freezing water, or play video games?

I would recommend not putting any passionate pleas or discussions on finding you or something the adoptive parents might not like in the lifebook without the ability to detach it. Anything like that, I would recommend giving seperately or putting inside in a way they can easily take out. I know it might not make others happy for me to say this, but wouldn't it be better for them to give the lifebook in 99% of its entirity (making the child see how much you care) than them not giving it at all?

Also, what kind of medical history have you had? I don't mean just for logical reasons, fun as well. Did you sprain your ankle all the time because you were a tomboy? Or break a leg playing football? Or have allergies? Asthma? Chicken pox? Any other family histories like cancer, alcoholism, mental illness, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, allergies to drugs?

What did you hope to be when you grew up when you were a child?

Do you have any other dreams (realistic like college or fantasy like being royalty)?

Tell about your pregnancy. Are you giving up caffiene, or going on walks, or getting super-stressed, or throwing up all the time, or enjoying the ultra-sounds, or scared about giving birth? What is your birth plan? Are you going to have an epidural? Give birth standing up? Not have a clue?

Remember, there is no right and wrong answer. This isn't to make you look great. This is to show who you really are so your child knows where s/he came from. That, in and of itself, will make you great. Your strengths, your weaknesses, your likes and dislikes, your past and your present... it all adds up to who you are. Just be honest.

[Linnie65]

Pcitures, pictures, pictures. OF you at all ages. I would have loved to see photos of my bmom and bdad - that's what I wanted the most, to see who I looked like.