[pucknstick]

over the past... wow, 10 or so years since I've been surfing the internet, I have read about a number of reunions, followed the entire feelings process leading up to, including and post reunion.

I guess I really don't want to find out who my birthmom is after all.

By reading these forums and web pages in the adoption ring, it seems that what reunited adoptees experience most often is an awkward uncomfortable occassion that ends up with either counseling or end of contact alltogether. I mean, knowing about medical history and genetic past may be important, may not. But I don't know if it's worth it to actually know the woman who gave me away.

I have changed my mind. I need to tell my Gladney group.

[m26d15]

Hi pucknstick,

it certainly is a very personal decision, and one must respect what others decide to do for themselves...but i just wanted to share that not all reunions are terrible.

my relationship with my bdad at first was filled with some difficult moments...and you know what...probably will continue to have its challenging times. but frankly, i think that is true of all family. life certainly isn't a fairy tale in my adoptive home...its just part of being any family.

but my relationship with my bdad continues to evolve. and i have learned more about myself through the process of reunion than i would have ever hoped to imagine. and i think thats what it about...its just a process of discovery after all. and some of us continue on as active parts in each others lives, and some don't. but i'd be willing to bet that most would count the sometimes painful lessons learned through reunion as being very worthy.

but you must do what is right for you...when its right for you...i just wanted to share why my reunion process has been so very valuable to me...

take care, m26