[kid2169]

I am in need of some creative ideas...

Without diving into all the details, my birthparents and my adoptive parents will be meeting for the first time face-to-face this Christmas. They have never seen (except in pictures) nor spoken to each other, but each set knows of the other, and knows of the relationship I have with each.

The question is simple...

What do I get each of the four individuals for Christmas?

[Nore]

How about a framed portrait of yourself and wife/husband/children...????

[Sharon]

This is a tough situation! There are many wrong answers, that's for sure.
My first question is, do they all (aparents and bparents) need to open their presents in front of one another? It's possible this could cause some sort of competition in which someone might end up feeling overlooked or slighted. Hopefully, that won't happen, but often in reunions feelings are easily wounded.
Maybe you could give each set of parents their presents separately, and then the meeting with all four could just be a holiday get-together minus the traditional public exchange of gifts?
That's one idea. Another is this: why not get your bmother and your amother each an identical locket with a photo of you inside? This would, in effect, be an acknowledgement that each of them love you and has played a role in making you who you are.
Or, maybe you should just get each of them something you know they'd like... you know them best, and probably have some idea of their tastes and preferences.
If you choose this route, my only advice would be to get gifts that are comparable in quality and price. If you feel the need to give any one of the four an obviously better and more expensive gift than the others, present this "special" gift at another time to spare the feelings of the rest.
Good luck to you! It sounds like an exciting situation. Please post and let us know how it turns out.
Best, ~ Sharon

[kid2169]

I will definitely use the portrait idea, Nore. I am not very "big" on picture taking or scrapbooking, and both sets of parents realize that. As a result, it would really be a pleasant surprise for them all to see that I have stepped outside of my usual character for them.

The portrait idea satisfies the "fair and equal" treatment concept which I hold very dear, and which you were so kind as to remind me of, Sharon. The schedule, as I have it planned thus far, is that my BP's will have already spent Xmas morning with my family and I, which is our traditional time for gift exchange. My AP's will be joining us late afternoon or early evening. Neither set knows that this meeting will be happening. In order to maintain the element of surprise, my BP's must not suspect that we are "holding back" gifts for a later time. I like the locket idea, but it is a little too self-centered for me. I did not reveal this in my earlier post, but I have six half-siblings on by BP's side, and two sibs on my AP's side. Although I am the eldest of all of them, I do not wish to be perceived as being put on a pedestal by either family. Your idea triggered another thought for me though...Have you ever seen the "Mother Pendant"? When I first met my BP's I saw this and considered it as a gift, but was not sure if it would be received as being "generic". What would you think if you received this gift from your birthchild as well as watching your birthchild's adoptive mother receive one at the same time?

Thanks to both of you for your correspondence!

[Nore]

Even though when my Amom was alive, I did give her jewelry, you have a sensative situation here. Not sure if jewelry is the right way to go.
Because you "love" to get your picture taken I think the pic is a great idea - it also gives you a topic of dicussion - the determination it took to get it done.
Good luck with your surprise meeting, and keep us posted.
Haven't tracked down my Bmom/siblings yet - but would love any advise (or lessons learned) for when I do.
Nore