[rrolling]

This question is going to seem strange and cruel but my wife and I need help in this area. 12 years ago I adopted my daughter from my wifes 1st marriage. There is a special reason that my wife and I have agreed that I would/should give up my parental rights to our daughter. It's not medical, mental, forced, or any other bad reason. Yes we are divorcing but it is going very well as we have agreed together on every issue concerning the divorce and things are moving along nicely. There are no other party's (lovers) envolved here on either side. We have no outside pressures and have avoided the blood sucking lawyers. This is not an issue of whether I love my daughter or not but it is somewhat personal and would be lengthy to get into. So, my question again is: Can I give up my parental rights to my adopted daughter and if so how do we go about it?

[DianeS]

Giving up parental rights to an adopted child is just as difficult as giving up rights to a biological child.

In short, it's nearly impossible unless one parent remarries and desires a stepparent adoption (as you have possibly learned through being there yourself). Depending on your state and local laws, it may be possible, but it isn't at all likely, and the possibilities may involve choices you do not wish to make (pleading guilty to abandonment, or accusing your wife of fraudulently getting your consent, for example).

You'll need to consult a lawyer, as it is certainly impossible to do without one. The "niceness" of your divorce situation won't enter the equasion at all, and your reason aren't likely to matter unless there is a legal loophole involved somewhere.

One more thing: at 12+ years of age, your daughter's opinion of this will most likely matter to the judge. If your daughter is now over age 18 this whole thing may be a different story, but if so it is she who would have to initiate and follow through the process, it couldn't be done by either parent.

[rrolling]

Thank you so much for your reply. My daughter is 14 and has been side by side with us in this difficult time. She understands why this may be neccesary and has not shown any dissagreement with the situation. She knows that I love her dearly and I know this is a confusing situation but we will work through it. Thank you again for your help and advice. It is much apreciated.

[sam_i_am_71801]

A couple months ago I learned that an adoptive parent may not disinherit an adopted child, however they may disinherit a biological child. Your situation and circumstances maybe somewhat different. So I don't know if this would be of any help to you. It is just what I was told. You will have to consult a lawyer to find out the laws in your state.

[rrolling]

Thank you for replying. We have found that this unadoption will not need to take place. This is a blessing. Nothing else in the situation has changed but I am happy that it will not be neccesary. Truth and Love will overcome a lot of problems.

Thanks again.