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we have a 10 year old girl who was placed with us from NJ at age 9. to answer your questions
-we called the social worker to confirm they were still accepting home studies, then had our agency forward ours. later we called the NJ sw to make sure it was received.
-NJ was very willing to reimburse costs for travel, our agency's fees, etc.
-we travelled to meet the child for the first visit. we stayed in a hotel for the weekend and took her out for day visits during that time.
-after that she came to us for weekend visits over a period of 6 weeks. for the first couple of these visits her sw drove her down and actually stayed at a nearby hotel for the weekend, in case we or the child needed her. I can't say enough about how helpful she was through the whole process.
-after that we would usually meet the sw halfway to get our daughter to & from the weekend visits.
I've heard a lot of bad things about dyfs but I have to say our experience with NJ has been very positive. Most of their waiting children seem to be AA and they are very open to placing children transracially.
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