[Chicken8182]

I don't know your relationship with your sis/sil , but I guess what you kinda really need to figure out is what type of relationship you really want to have with her. for instance it's a little easier for my husband and I because basically our entire family has kind of washed their hands of her. I know that sounds harsh but every time we let her back in she screws up again. She gave birth to three children before the age of 22 I have #1 who is almost 5 now, her ex boyfriend who really isn't even the father has #2 and she just delivered #3 in jail and signed him over to her mother. You need to think very carefully about what is best for this child, not the bmom. Drug addiction is just so strong, i know there are people who want to quit but they just cant, and as long as they continue the drug use it just get's worse and worse beleive me my sil started smoking pot at age 11 and at age 22 she is severely addicted to crack cocaine and heroine and now that she's incarcerated she is using comecary money to buy prescription meds off of other inmates it never ends unless they really really want it to , and if losing your child is not enough reason to quit i don't know what is. Hell my sil lost 3 kids and still doesn't get it. I hope you consider this bc that baby really needs you, you sound like wonderful people and I know how hard it is when relatives are involved but it's worth the pain and suffering to give that baby a stable loving home. What state do you live in by the way? I live in Indiana and I don't know how it works everywhere but when we went to tpr i was told by the judge that he strongly discouraged visitation afterward he also granted a no contact order. In regards to what the child will address bmom as my daughter rarely speaks of her but when she sees a pic or something she calls her by her first name and knows that that is daddy's and uncle d's sister. If you have a hard time w other family members just sit them down and explain your reasoning for your choices if they still disagree just give it time and they'll come around in the mean time agree to disagree, but stand your ground don't give in to family pressures if it means putting your child at risk. good luck if you have any questions feel free to ask.