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Our agency strongly suggested using an IA doc for our referral. However, when we were given a referral, they did request that we get the IA doc to look over the information as quickly as possible. The reason wasn't because they were trying to push us into making a decision, but more because Kaitlin didn't exactly match our wish list. If we decided against her, then they had another family waiting that she might have been a good fit for. They wanted us to decide within 5 business days so that they could offer her to someone else if we declined. Our first choice for IA was out of the country for 3 weeks (and I certainly didn't expect them to wait that long for a decision), and the other one had a waiting list of over a week. We ended up finding a terrific IA doc who understood our situation and stayed late to look over our information and spend over an hour on the phone with me answering all of my anxious questions.
So, I guess my point is, sometimes an agency may want you to make a decision quickly so they can find the child a home if you decide against accepting the referral, not because they're being underhanded about anything. However, if they ask you not to have a referral checked out, then I would be very suspicious of their motives, and would be very concerned about the agency. They should never discourage you from getting a doctor's opinion.
Of course, the doctor said Kaitlin looked wonderful (although she made herself available for us while we were in country if we should need her to look ove any additional photos or information), and we accepted the referral within 2 business days. If a doctor gets a lot of publicity due to a high profile client, then I would expect their wait list to become rather long, and would certainly try to locate another doctor. There are many, many good IA docs out there, just some are more "popular" than others.
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Kim
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