[spaypets]

Rambled? No, it's fascinating. I've been thinking about _why_ I believe what I do about the importance of religion in my dd's upbringing. Some of it stems from an event that happened back when I was a reporter.

I'd been sent to cover the graduation exercises of two girls who had been home schooled in a fundamentalist Christian tradition. And I was struck at how sure they were about, well, everything. They were going to go on to college at Bob Jones University and were sure they would get married and have babies and their whole lives were mapped out according to a set plan.

And I have to admit, there was something very attractive about that to me. They had all the answers and were so sure, there wasn't any of the wondering about who they were in the world. They KNEW.

Later, after the article ran, I got a note from one of the mothers inviting me to come to their church. The reason I wasn't tempted was because my _religion_ had taught me that the questions were more important than the answers. Years of sitting through discussions of pilpul (the endless debates of the ancient rabbis, who rarely settled the matter) during Passover had taught me that.

That's not to say that I believe religion is a requirement to lead an upstanding life. My own dearly missed grandfather, in whose memory my daughter is named, was an atheist. He was also the most upstanding, moral, ethical person I have ever known. And he raised my mother, who is equally honest and ethical.

But in a society such as ours, where even our leaders (even the supposedly religious ones) think morality, honesty and ethics are for other people, I am not so sure that I could impart such values without a cookbook, so to speak.

I am not a fundamentalist, I'm not even Orthodox. We miss more sabbath services at the temple than we go to. I mix milk with meat and wear wool and cotton together. But, we light the candles on Friday nights and bless the food and wine. We don't eat bread during Passover. And, when the first buds appear on the trees in the springtime or the first snowflakes fall in the winter, I say the She'hechianu (sp?)--the prayer that thanks G-d for bringing us to this season.