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I think you have to be prepared for anything.
I have two children by adoption one was very easy to bond with; the other was not easy to bond with. Different kids with different personalities - we're different parents, too.
One of my close friends has two children by birth (about the same ages as my two kids). She says one was very easy to bond with; the other was not easy to bond with. I was surprised to hear that, but in a way, I was relieved that we were going through normal parenting issues.
I don't think it's all bad to have to work at bonding with your child. It really helped us to read some parenting books on bonding and attachment - that gave us a few practical ideas about what to do with a child who doesn't bond easily. A lot of the activities are really fun for any child and parent!
And, at least from my experience, the work pays off. Is it frustrating at times, yes. But it's something you can work with. Bonding and attachment isn't just an "adoption thing" - it's a "having kids" thing.
Rebecca
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