[lyndayle]

Our boys both just turned 4. We made our first visit in March (we're still waiting to go back). The two boys seem to be at rather different interest levels, since one is the oldest child in a baby home, and the other is the youngest child in an all-ages orphanage. They reflect the attitudes of the children they are with, rather than a more age-appropriate level.

We took coloring books, crayons, puzzles, modeling clay, photo albums (with their picture on the cover and picture of their new brother in the other orphanage, as well as home, family and pet shots), stuffed toys (we have identical ones for the second trip, so they can keep the ones they have slept with since our first visit), dried fruit, nuts, animal cookies and bottled water. We also took several inexpensive, very cute, animal hand puppets from Dollar General ($1 each!). One of them resembled our dog, so they could get used to the idea of having a pet.

We made a mistake in the baby home: we gave the art supplies and puzzles to the orphanage director, before we met Sasha, as a gift for all the children. We wished we had saved them to use during our play with Sasha.

As it was, he is in a rather nice home with lots of toys already in two large playrooms, so we weren't out of luck for playthings. One of them had a puppet theater, and he loved using the puppets we brought. It was a great way for us to relate to him through animal sounds and kissy noises. He also loved the food, since what we think of as simple pleasures are a luxury to him. He wanted to hold and control the packages of food, but was very happy to share with all and sundry from the contents--he handed out individual nuts, fruit and cookies to us and our facilitator. Very funny and cute. He also drank from the water bottle like a pro, and was happy to share his backwash with everyone!

We corrected our premature gift-giving mistake on our visit to Pasha, which was fortunate. He is in a poor rural orphanage, and we were all put into a very small "time out" room with few toys. The things we'd brought came in very handy, though he much preferred the noisy toy helicopter, car and guns (not our choice, believe me) that our facilitators went out and purchased--without our knowing--when they heard that he liked those things. They also brought him some M&Ms, which he gobbled up as quickly as we'd let him.

Both boys really liked the photo albums, and pointed from our pictures to us, recognizing who we were. The dog and cat photos were a huge hit, and Sasha asked us if next time we came we would bring him a red dog (our longhaired dachshund is red, and the photo got his hopes up).

In retrospect, I wish we had taken more grown-up, building-type toys like tinker toys or leggos. Both boys seem to be very analytical, and like to manipulate things with their hands (future engineers and surgeons, no doubt!). While Sasha was still very happy to play with stuffed toys and puppets, he would have really enjoyed something more advanced, as we found out when he spent half an hour dissasembling and reassembling a plastic kiddy gymnastics set. And Pasha has been hanging out with teenage boys, so his mindset is more adult already.

When we go back the second time, we are taking things like cars, juvenile reading and picture books, kids CDs and DVDs (if we can find the room to take a portable DVD player), and more coloring supplies, as well as the makings for some lightweight craft projects. We're also taking a couple of fleece blankets from "Babushka" to snuggle with on the plane, and some beach balls. I'm packing their stuff in two new backpacks, so they will have their own carry-on full of fun things on the airplanes, too. We want to give them a head start on the English while we're there, hence the books, etc. (I'm also studying Russian kid-language with a Ukrainian woman before we go.) I wish we had room for a set of leggos, but the luggage weight restrictions may preclude anything like that.

If anyone has more ideas on what kinds of things to take on the second trip for 4-year-old boys, I'd really appreciate your input. I'm a first-time mom, and every little bit of info makes me feel more secure about taking this plunge into motherhood.