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Shycar,
I am SOOOOOOOOO sorry for you. It's like a death, isn't it? And nothing anybody says seems to help, and sometimes what they say just irritates you more.
When my twins left after 13 months (they were 5 by then), I wanted to die. I did not want to function. I thought I'd never get over it. I cried myself to sleep every night. Everything flooded my heart with memories and my eyes with tears.
Then, one day it hurt a little less. A few days later, it hurt a little more less.
But many of us have been there. Vent your anger and frustration, pour out your heart and your sorrow. We're all here for you. To listen, to keep your grief and heartbreak in our thoughts and eventually to begin your healing in our hearts.
Take care of yourself in this dark time. It's hard. Very hard. But you have to. I'll help in any way I can.
My heart goes out to you.
Sandy
__________________
Proud foster mama of many;
Proud transracial adoptive mama of:
J, age 9-1/2, and Q, age 7 (OMG!!!)
Still hoping for more kids..... 
Nellie (the cat), adopted stray
"Friends are the family you choose."
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