[sak9645]

First off, please remember that the homestudy is mainly about preparing you to be an adoptive parent. In the counseling sessions, you will probably talk a lot about such things as strategies for dealing with relatives and friends who may oppose the adoption or have racial prejudices, for teaching your child to appreciate his/her cultural heritage, for dealing with delays and insecure attachment, and so on.

Second, the homestudy does have to approve you, but it is mainly interested in whether you can provide a safe and welcoming home for a child. If you are reasonably healthy mentally and physically, if you have no significant criminal or substance abuse history, if you have a stable income, and if your home is decent enough for you to entertain your mother-in-law or your boss, you will probably do just fine. You will have to share some information that you normally keep private, such as how much you earn and whether you have ever sought counseling, but it really isn't too terrible.

Three, the homestudy is not a pop quiz. At every step of the way, you can and should ask questions, both about the adoption process and about raising an adopted child.

As an example, feel free to ask if you have any concerns about your house, before you start the homestudy or before the home visit. Each state has different rules with regard to things like whether the child's room must be set up in advance, the size of a child's bedroom, children sharing a bedroom, how many bathrooms you need for a given number of people, number of smoke detectors, whether you need a fire extinguisher in the kitchen, etc.

Also feel free to ask if you have questions about whether there are any good attachment therapists in the area, how well your child will adjust if you need to use day care, whether you should take your current children with you when you travel to China, etc.

I hope that everything goes well, not just with your homestudy, but with your adoption, and that you will soon have another child in your home.

Sharon