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My husband and I were in the same situation. We originally got in to fosercare to adopt a child privately that we had been contacted about. The biomom had lost 4 other children and was still using crack. She was in jail once again and she knew she could not keep the baby. (They always think clearer when they are in jail). Amyway, we were all set. Everything paid, the fees, the lawyer had been paying her living expenses for 6 months (Ok I was too stupid to NOT know that she was not having to pay rent in the halfway house she was in). MAke a long story short, 2 weeks before the baby was born the biomom chose to keep her baby (only to lose him to DCS in LA) 2 weeks after his birth. We did not know the race of this baby, but was told it could be part AA, part hispanic or all caucasian. The child ended up being part AA. My father and 2 of my uncles were not happy with u s wanting to bring this child into the family .(We got into foster care so that we could get him placed with us) I finally told my father what I thought of his prejudice . I basically told him that the child was going to be in our family, be our child and he could either accept it and accept him as our child orwe could just stay away all together as well as our other children.
He now accepts the idea just fine. We did not get that baby. He was placed with an AA foster family in LA (the biomom got visitation so the child had to stay in state.
Just do what your heart tells you. If the family loves you, they will love the child too. However you will be in for some rocky times ahead.
MAry
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