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I have also struggled with the PC thing to say when I speak of my children. Over the era of "labeling" every little thing and trying to be PC, I fall all over myself.
Even on the forum, I go to say something about Stacy and I identify her as my "oldest"...she is, but she isn't. Jennifer is technically the "oldest." Am I supposed to clarify and elaborate by saying "my oldest parented child?!" How confusing is that???
Missy faces the same thing with the death of Chance. When someone asks how many kids she has, she doesn't know what to say. She said she feels guilty if she claims to have only 2 boys, but if she says 3, that leads to an explanation that one passed.
My theory is that when relating to strangers, I say I have 3 children...partly because Jennifer is not part of my life in a physical way...only emotionally.
She is certainly no secret, and I will freely share my feelings and information when I think it can somehow benefit the person I am communicating to, but sometimes too much information only puts people at a disadvantage. The are caught off guard and feel it is somehow necessary to offer the obligatory remarks that they "understand," or whatever...like I need some validation that I am "okay."
~Deb
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