[sugarbabysmommy]

Brandy, I knew there wasn't much of a relationship with your birthmother, but didn't realize how little. I missed the part about the relationship she and your father had. So guilt yes, but also think about your mother and what their marriage has been like, might he also be expressing his undercurrent of feelings about his wife, and her state of motherhood? I may be way off base, like I was before, but I wanted to throw it out there.

Guilt plays on us in strange ways. Guilt coupled with fear makes us do and say strange things. My mom flipped when we told her we were going to adopt. I sat there crying as I told her knowing she wouldn't be on our side. Why should we have to plead our case to our family, why can't they trust us?

His response about bringing someone else's child into your family causing trouble says a lot about his parenting of you and other things you have shared about your youth. Sadly, this is all about him, and it will make him even harder to talk to. Take care, I wish I had some recipe to make this all better.