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Don't give up, keep trying you'll find the right place for you and your child. I too am a parent over 35, Dh and I have 5 children, 4 sons(bio) and a daughter 26 months(home from Korea 8/03)
We recently moved from Ma. where we lived on a military base, which had all kinds of families, to an area that is not quite so culturally diverse.(one would think it would be as it's near a military instillation)
Anyway our children are 16,14,11,26 months and 9 1/2 months. I don't really fit in with the older boys friends parents, we have babies they don't, and the play group we hooked up with,the moms don't seem to be too interested in meeting new people. Not all of them but a few. Some of them are nice. My biggest problem is the lack of participation from week to week. They seem to think they need to continually entertain their children, whereas I'm more content to take lunch and go to the park, which by the way is "THE BEST PARK" I've ever been too. The funny thing is, the few mom's that I do talk with, at gymnastics(older boys participate), are all between the ages of about 25-30. They seem genuinely interested in the adoption process, but it doesn't dominate conversations. Two of the women are of middle eastern decent, not sure where I didn't ask, as it didn't seem to matter. I would try a local park on different days between 9-noon. Or later in the afternoon on different days. I have found the more organized the play group the less fun, for me and my children. Also try the local library, they generally have story time. Sometimes you have to make yourself go back, more than once or twice, because depending on the day different people will show up. I know after paying "dues" to join this playgroup, and the somewhat snooty attitude of some of the women, I was tempted to not go back. But I'm glad I did because I have met a couple of nice women. I just pick and choose what I'm going to do with them. example, they thought taking playgroup to the mall at Christmas time and shopping was fun, not I said the fly. When they go to the park/beach, firehouse type places we'll go, otherwise we just go to the park. Anyway, sorry to be so long winded. It's hard to find people that we feel comfortable with. Right now I doubt I'll make any lasting friendships with these women, but I go so my little ones have some children to play with, and I can at least visit, even on trivial matters, with someone other than my 2 yo. Good luck Shelley
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