[antifloyd]

Originally Posted by Missourimomtobe

It almost seems like the birthparents won't let go somehow ... I feel like if I am raising this child from birth, then *I* am the child's mother. Period. I am the one there for the child 24/7/lifelong ... why would the child need to call anyone else mom?

Well, that is kind of a correct assumption... most birthparents DON'T want to let go! In my personal case I just felt like it was the best option for my daughter to have a good life as opposed to me becoming a single mom at 17 and still in high school.
I had actually never used the terms "aparents" and "bparents" until coming to the forums. Although I know it may have been confusing for people who weren't familiar with the situation, I have talked about "my daughter's mom" before. Amanda refers to me by my first name. However, my sister refers to our mom (HER bmom) as Mom.
My personal feeling: I am my daughter's mom. Patti is my daughter's mom. I feel that we can both be that. It takes nothing away from either of us. Am I upset that Amanda doesn't refer to me that way? Not a bit. It was completely her choice. It was never a condition to our relationship.