[leenab]

A word about court ordered visitations. Raj's visits with his siblings were ordered by the court. We went to the first one and only H showed up, the cw for A & S didn't bother to bring the girls. This was in april. And then Raj had the bad reaction to H, so we didn't continue. His behaviors were severe enough that the cw & supervisor thought it would be best to stop visits. (note: TPR had already occured so Raj was legally free).

In August we went to H's 10th b-day party and that was a complete disaster. H even left the party for a while and told Raj that he smelled like fish and had crabs/bugs. Not a very nice thing for H to say, and he said it in front of me.

In August we also met S & A for the first time at S's 8th b-day party. A(6 yrs old) has a ton of issues which were very evident within the first few minutes of meeting her. She actaully tried to convince me to adopt her and when I tried to skirt the issue she got mad at me & Raj. A even got into a fight with another girl at the party. A few months ago A was in RTC for a breakdown.

Anyway it just seems like S gets along well with Raj. So she's the only we really keep in contact with. She is somewhat "parentified" but when she comes over I tend to really spoil her and make sure she doesn't feel like she has to take care of Raj. Raj has great stories he tells us about S giving him bottles when he was little. So I know she really cared for him a lot. The last time S was here she and I took our puppy on a walk so I got to know her a little bit better.

I suggest trying a visit. You never really know before hand how it's going to turn out. I never thought I'd have Raj's sister S ovver for dinner, but it's so normal for it to happen now.

Hang in there,
LeenaB