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Tricia:
My feelings are similar to yours. I had a great family, and my search for my birthmom had absolutely nothing to do with any lack on their part, as far as I was concerned. I was so afraid to tell them about the search, because I was certain my mom would be hurt, and she was worried. I feel terrible about that - and I've tried to reassure her that she will not, could not, ever, ever "lose me", which seems to be what she fears. I'm so sad to see that it does happen - I really can't fathom except in extreme cases -- since that makes it all the more difficult to allay her fears.
These things are so hard for everyone, aren't they? I do tend to treat the subject very gingerly, and not share as much as I'd like to, mostly out of fear of hurting her more -- though sometimes I wonder if her fears aren't magnified by her knowledge that I'm withholding a lot of detail. Sigh. I'm just hoping that over time she will see that our relationship is as strong as ever, and, in some ways, even stronger.
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