[bohtieque]

Hi, everyone--

I'm 32, married, and have been trying to get pregnant for over 3 years. My husband and I have both been to an fertility specialist and found that due to extremely low count, motility, etc., it's going to be "very hard" for us to get pregnant (as if I couldn't figure that one out!).

We've been talking for a long time about adoption. My husband and his two siblings were all adopted, so he has an extremely healthy attitude and first-hand knowledge of what it is to be adopted. My family has always been the type that loves children, no matter what, so I don't think we'll have any problems with family, like some do.

The problem is financial. My husband and I are both teachers. He just got his certification and first job this year, so we just began paying his student loans, which are...horrific. Our house is warm, safe and comfortable, but probably a little shabby if looked at through other's eyes. (What does it take to pass a home study? Do our surrounding matter?) We can afford to pay for daycare for a child, but I'm not so sure daycare, saving for emergencies and paying off an adoption loan of $25,000 can happen.

We would love a child. I think I know how to raise one well--even at the difficult teen years, which I have firsthand dealings with every day. I just don't know if we can afford it.

I'm going to add in something that's going to upset a few people, I'm sure, but I want to be truthful. I know we aren't looking to adopt a child who is emotionally disturbed or cognitively disabled. We're fine with possible learning disorders and children of races different from our own, though.

How much does adoption really cost? Are there ways to make it more affordable for us?

Julie