Claud,
Thank you for sharing... I have so been experiencing all of this. I am physically in pain from the grief... it is lessening... the physical pain and looking back and revisiting that young broken child that was myself is where I am now.
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And it was really, really hard to admit it about myself. To see how damaged I was and how I ended up "getting" something from the adoption process. How I needed to have these total strangers, the agency and adoptive parents, quailfy me for goodness because I was so failed and broken from home.
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This quote is where I find myself now. God... I have to tell you it is so good to talk to someone who has been there. So many are afraid to discuss it or acknowledge it. Being a birthmother is extremely isolating even when your situation does not have to be a secret. It is isolating because no one truly gets it... except for those who have been there.
Thank you again for sharing... it is amazingly helpful.
Kim