We too, had a real struggle coming up with financing for adoption. I would venture to say that compared to most people who choose to adopt we are in the lower income bracket.
First thing we did was write down all of our expenses. Then we looked at EVERYTHING and decided whether or not it was a necessity. For example, we decided the world wouldn't stop spinning if we didn't have a cell phone. Also, we drive an 87 Jeep and a 98 Hyundai, but they're paid for...
ALL of our savings went for the adoption. Unfortunately what we don't save between now and the time our 7 yr old hits college we'll have to deal with then. (But at least she'll have a little brother who can't wait to take over her room when she does go.
We also applied for two grants. However, I would think of these as a bonus, not a means to adopt. The one we received ($3000)we waited nearly 6 months to be notified about. If we had traveled when our original agency said we would go, it never would have done us any good.
You mentioned that you are a stay-at-home-mom. Is there any at home jobs you could take? I did that and made several thousand $
Other ideas: My husband started cutting grass on the weekends. We had yard sales. We saved our tax refund check. (Also, some agencies will let you borrow based on the anticipated 10K tax credit.)
An added bonus to all of this work...We never had to wonder whether one of us wasn't committed to the adoption, because our actions showed we wanted this more than anyTHING!
Last words of encouragement...We waited 18 months of ups and downs, changing countries, agencies, but finally at what turned out to be the perfect time we met our beautiful boy. Waiting is hard, but you can look back afterwards and realize that some good came out of the wait and it makes a little sense.
Delmom
Daughter 7yrs
Son born 11/03 in Kaz & Adopted 7/04