elmarie wrote.. I pray every day that I will continue to have the strength and patience to hang in there and give him all the time and space he needs to process this.
I think if we allow ourselves to go through the emotions we will find that elusive patience
If we allow the anger (and do not put a time limit on it) we can find out what is the matter.. What we are angry with ourselves about..
Most of my anger though I directed (and still do) at myself. I'm still working on forgiving myself, or that scared, very confused and lonely girl. Intellectually I know I did the best I could do at the time with so few resources, but emotionally I'm not there yet. Do we ever get there completely?
I think we do.. I have met some amazing women on the net who are 'there'.. Birthmoms who are taking the time to run groups and tell the new ones coming up that you can sort this..
The woman who runs (or did run) the Sunflower reunion group is one of those.. An amazing woman.
But I believe (I may be totally wrong) that I have forgiven myself..
I remember when I confronted myself..When I said to myself "How could you do that?" and "I am angry that you did that."
Julia Cameron.. 'The Artist Way' wrote about anger..
page 61
Cameron writes.. ...what we do with our anger is stuff it, deny it, bury it, block it, hide it, lie about it, medicate it, muffle it, ignore it. We do everything but listen to it..
she also wrote..
...anger is a map..
me writing......
If we won't face the anger in ourselves.. at ourselves.. we can not find the map.. We can't find those triggers that started us being angry with ourselves.. The why of it..
As Peter Gabriel wrote.. "Find the places we got hurt."
That's an act of love for ourselves..
And I agree with what you said about ER and the incredible clear thinking of that script..
Jackie