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I'm so sorry. That is terrible news.
If the birthmom came back into the picture would you still consider adopting the baby? Just because the baby has been exposed to drugs doesn't mean it's the end of the world. I have two....soon to be three beautiful children who were either exposed to drugs, alchohol or smoking or all. They are all so wonderful and although i wish they had the best start at life....(like I know I could have provided for them) God had different plans. We have little problems pop up here and there but nothing that can't be overcome. These children along with many many others will grow up to be healthy strong indiviuals who will be able to make it on their own.
I've heard of many birthmoms who kinda dissapear for a little while then re-appear when the baby is due. She obviously is going through a rough time. Maybe she also feels ashamed for using drugs, when she's pregnant ,but doesn't know how to get through life and difficult choices without them).
I am in no way saying it's ok to use drugs while you are pregnant....but their is another human being involved not just your baby. We all make mistakes....in one way or another.....I wouldn't give up on her yet(unless she tells you the deal is off she's keeping her baby).
Don't give up hope. The process of adoption isn't easy but it is definately worth it. If this match doesn't work out than...maybe her baby wan't meant to be yours for one reason or another you have to trust in God. He is over all things and he loves you and wants to bless you. He certianly isn't punishing you. If anything maybe he is having you go through all these trials so you can feel compassion for others going through similiar experiences.
Good luck and best of wishes to you that everything works out and you still get your christmas baby.
Jessica
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