[tobeafamily]

Amom,

I agree with what you said. We cannot expect paparents to become counselor, educator, and protector of the pbfamily.

To protect her own emotions, though, I have to stand by that she should at least offer the services of a third party to this couple so they can objectively look at what they want. She should be as sure as possible that they are in lock step - and that goes beyond deep, tearful, emotionally charged long talks on the telephone.

Because if they 'get it wrong', it's a lifetime of heartache for her, them, and this child.

I know how hard it is to walk away because we did it. At the time, it seemed like the worst thing in the world. We questioned our sanity, our desire to become parents, our agency, God, etc. In the end, I'm glad we did, though, because now I see it would have been a disaster.

The world works in mysterious ways.

IMHO

Regina