[Lynn Barry]

"No matter where your child is adopted from, you will, as adoptive parents, need to ‘deal with’ your child's birthfamily whether you know the birthfamily or not. This birthfamily is a part of who your child is. Open adoption allows you to know your child better by knowing his birthfamily."


I copied and pasted this from the section on this website about open adoptions...

I guess my hope is that more prospective adoptive parents understand this concept and prepare themselves for the reality of their parenting experience and that althought you legally hgave adopted someone else's child they are not your alone and with this comes situations that you need to be ready in your heart muind and soul to possibly have to deal with...wish I had be instructed about that instead of the

change their name
forget about their foster parents or having any contact

pretty much told to sweep the past under the rug and pretend there is no past...just your child to raise...

later BAM ... the past comes to the present and WAM...you are unprepared and left broken and bitter...

I also felt good about reading in the same section that this relationship is similar to in-law juggling...

I firmly believe that now after my daughter reunited...........