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Old 10-26-2004, 10:08 AM
DianeS DianeS is offline
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Apparantly you didn't know that it actually costs the same to adopt a child from the state system as it does to adopt a child privately. The ONLY difference is that when you adopt privately, the adoptive parents pay all the costs, and when you adopt from the state, its the taxpayers who pay the cost.

The lawyers cost the same, the agency costs the same, the paper-pushers cost the same, the receptionist costs the same, etc. The bulk of those costs are covered by tax dollars, and the wanna-be adoptive parents are charged a tiny bit of the cost to ensure that people who start the process of adoption intend to complete it and aren't just there wasting their time and annoying people behind them in line who really intend to adopt. People are less likely to screw around and mess up everyone else's time if it costs them 50 dollars to start the process.

There is no form of adoption where an adult is "purchasing" a child. None. In all cases it is the adult paying the fees associated with legally transferring a child from one family to another. Similar to a divorce and remarriage, usually with medical and transportation costs thrown in. You don't consider people to have purchased their child from the hospital when they give birth, pay fees, and bring the child home, and adoption is the same way. You are not purchasing a child just because you adopt, pay fees, and bring the child home.

The stipend that is given to special needs children is the CHILD's money. And in some cases you are not given a choice about receiving it. It is intended to make it so that adopting a special needs child does not put any monetary stress on the family - for instance, so that the existing children do not have to do without something just because mom and dad decided to adopt a child who needed a little extra help. That wouldn't be either fair or right, and that's one reason the subsidies are offered. Regardless of the severity of the special need, children from foster care often need counseling even if nothing else, and the subsidy can ensure that you don't have to pay out of pocket for most of those costs. It can also cover the costs associated with the lawyer you may need to make sure your child is given the assistance necessary to attend public events, if the child is pysically disabled. It can pay for the tutor if the child is learning disabled. It can pay for extra treamtent Medicaid won't cover if you were lied to about the child's behavior.

If you truly don't need the money, stick it in a savings account for the child's college expenses, his/her first house downpayment, or something like that. A lot of adoptive parents do that. A lot of children adopted from foster care appreciate having *something* come easy for them, since usually the first half of their life was difficult enough.

Good luck!
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