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Oh Gina,
I understand just how you feel. I know about the wondering if God is on a coffee break sometimes. I remember pleading with God to take my desire to me a mom to another child away because the waiting hurt so much sometimes. I felt so alone but had friends that wanted to support me but many didn't know how. I still spend many nights sitting in a hot bathtub crying. All I can do is remind you that God hears you. He hasn't left you. We don't get to know His plans always or right away. If we did, we might be more overwhelmed and confused or end up messing things up. These times I believe, our faith is being tried. So rejoice in that now you are at the point to put this matter into God's hands to take care of. You can't carry all this yourself because you are human. Don't allow the enemy to take this time that God is growing you and wanting to bless you to allow him to beat you down and take any of your joy. I don't know exactly why God uses situations like these to refine us, but I do know it brings humility, compassion of others, a drive to be the best mom and be thankful for what we have... I know, had some very special ladies in my life not gone through what God allowed them to go through, I wouldn't have had the wonderful support and Godly guidence that I recieved durring my hard times. I am right with you Gina. I have my good days and bad. But I have been encouraged to thank God for what He's done and what He's doing with me. He is not done blessing your life Gina. Hang in there and you are in my prayers tonight.
Melissa
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