[nrj]

My adoption of j was disrupted yesterday. It was a decision that I had to make for the best interest of both of us. It was a very very difficult decision for me. J was moved to a foster home in the neighborhood and school district where she stayed last, with a single fostermother. She accepted it better than I had expected. I believe she realized that it wasn't going to work and was also ready to move on. Unfortunately mine was her 6th or 7th home. I feel at peace with my decision and looking back, I know that I did everything I could. I had to let her go. We agreed to keep in touch and said our final goodbyes. As she drove out of the driveway with her caseworker, I'm not sure if it really even hit her that she wouldnt be coming back again. They arrived at noon and by two she was gone. It was the first time I didn't wonder if there was anything else I could have done for her . I know that there wasn't. I know in my heart that I did my very best. I hope that she will take with her good memories of our family and the fun times we had and she will remember some of the things that I taught her. I don't know if she will keep in touch, but I hope so. If not, I will always wonder what happened to her and if I made a difference at all in her life. She will be in my prayers always. NRJ