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We just went through the same thing with our 2 foster kids. The older one (2 years behind his age group in school, and definitely behind the rest of his class --1st grade-- academically), was pulled out of school 2-3 times a week for visits. It drove us nuts. It also caused us to be concerned about our privacy (school papers going to visits with bmom could let her know what school he attended).
There was a lot of other things going on, and we tried to advocate for the kids. But, everytime we tried to get anything changed, we were threatened. It actually came down to us risking losing our little guy (been with us over a year) or to let the 2 foster kids go (they had only been here about 2 months). The final straw came when the SWs supervisor called our agency, threatened to pull our kids, and threatened to black list us. We had the kids moved.
Unfortunately, you have to play their games, or just have the kids removed. I was told that dozens of times by dozens of people. For us, it just became too risky to keep them here.
Hope things work out better for you than they did for us.
Darci
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