[sfbaymom2000]

Unfortunately, I think it is human nature to be judgemental to a degree, and to feel defensive when others make choices different than our own. This happens in many areas of life and many areas of parenting. I think working moms feel judged by moms who choose to (and are able) to stay home, and I think stay-home mom's feel judged (or de-valued) sometimes by working parents. The same thing happens with the breast feeding (when possible) and bottle feeding issue. Even people who choose private schools vs. those who choose public tend to judge each other. And the same thing happens with family size. I can't tell you how many people have pressured us to have another child and told us how awful it is to have/be an only child.

On the other hand, I have to admit that when I see very large families, I sometimes question how the parents can possibly provide enough individual attention to each child. Especially when I see a family with 5 or 6 biological children (never mind those extreme examples of 10 or 11 biological children!), I think...if they love kids so much, why ddin't they adopt or foster some of them. In fact, several people's responses to our adoption plans (from foster care) have been "Oh, I always wanted to do that, but these three/four already keep me busy!" I am thinking, well, you could have had two biological and then adopted two! So I know that I have been judgemental of others, and I certainly have felt judged - mainly about having an only child (so far). I have to say that everyone has been very supportive of our adoption plans.

Anyway, I know I have rambled! Just trying to say that I think it is human nature that when someone makes a decision that is different than yours, you may take that to mean they think your choice is wrong. Don't know what to do about it, but I think it is just natural.

Have a great day!
Lynn