[love4]

I am willing to be very open with my girls. My two youngest were placed with me when they were 11 and 12. They have a lot of emotions and we sit freely and talk about their birthparents. They tell me how much they love their birthparents and someday want to meet them. Next year I am planning to take my youngest to the area she grew up because she wants to see the area and where she lived. I support her need to know. I supported all my daughters. I have enough compassion to realize they had a life before here. If I could love them enough to allow them their feelings about their birthparents, could they try and have compassion for the mom who raised them and loved them through all their sad emotions? I listened and understood as much as possible because I didn't live it. My youngest is very hurt by my oldest daughter not being much a part of our lives. She can't imagine walking out on me when she finally meets her birthparents. She appreciates everything I do and shows it all the time. It helps me to feel cared about. My oldest is now 29. She is not a child anymore. She should be able to give love instead of just sucking the life out of us.
My oldest daughter is so wrapped up in her own little world of anger that she can't see that we truly, truly love her. We are still here for her and will always be. I am her mom and she is my daughter. When she lets go of all her anger at life, she will see her parents waiting for her with love and compassion. I can't let go of 29 years. I can sit back and wait.......! Give her space as hard as it may be. love4