[love4]

Jude,
You mentioned guilt caused to adoptive parents because of reunion and I think my daughter feels guilty so she she soothes it by getting angry because I have emotions. According to her I am not suppose to hurt but she doesn't make much effort to let me know she cares. She abandons us for long periods of time until I feel the need to connect. I call and she won't respond for weeks. She can't see that it hurts us for her to respond as she does. She has missed many important family events such as birthdays, graduations, mother's day, father's day and can't understand why I would hurt. I was told this is not about me but about her and her birthparents healing. I met her birthparents. I liked them. I was willing for us to all be friends. No response. She told me I had her for 28 years and now it's their turn.
One would think I must have been a horrible mom but I gave my all to my girls. I loved them dearly. It hurts to think others could be thinking I was a bad mom. I worked so hard!
I am like Joanne. I work through issues by reading, and more reading. I search for support. My daughter was in therepy for years and I went with her. I put myself in her shoes and felt compassion and a deep love. Even through all this she is my girl and I love her. I tell her so. love4