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I think if it is upsetting you that much seeing your child with the adoptive parents then maybe it would be best for you not to see the child. I don't think that is being selfish at all and I'm sure they would be willing to continue to send you pictures, letters, etc. as often as you would like. Maybe if you only saw the child every 6 months or yearly it would be a little easier - I don't know, only you can make that decision. Good luck with whatever you decide.
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Denise
Birth mom to Melissa(26), Jessica(23) & Allison(18)
Legal Guardian to Harley(8)
Adoptive Mom to Shawn (8), Shilo (5), and Zackery (5)
Grandma to Frankie (3)
Grandma to Jaelyn Rae born 10/6/06
Grandma to Bailey Mae born 1/4/07
Foster mom to A (3) and B (2)
I'm gonna be a Grandma AGAIN 1/09 
 It's another girl!!!!
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