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>Chris ~ I read your original post on this thread and was really unsure of how to respond. I felt that I didn't have the whole story, both sides, and I didn't want to jump to conclusions. Well, I still think that I do not know the whole story, but the more you have posted, the scarier your role in this seems to be. I'm sorry Chris, but for a guy of your age, there is a lot of squawking and whining, he said she said, and he did she did. I really wanted to keep my mind open to why your girlfriend's parental rights have been taken, but there is no chance of that now.
I applaud your not wanting to jump to conclusions.
>1.) People with $0 in the bank can still parent. That is what public assistance is for, and it's not a bad thing if it is used properly.
While you are correct about going on Public Assistance, the key is using it properly. She does not use her $ wisely.
>2.) Bunion surgery does not cancel out a person's ability to parent. She may need extra help for awhile. I had my shoulder operated on and I'm still recovering. I've recieved extra help from my family. Does this mean I am unable to parent?
Bunion surgery definitely does not cancel out a person's ability to parent. Indirectly, the same thing could be said of me, when I had a cast on my arm over the Winter(I had a hair-line fracture in my right wrist from a bike accident)
> 3.) Depression, bipolar disorder, does not cancel out anyone's ability to parent. If anything, and we will never know, she may have worked on her issues even harder, with her child in mind. What you and CPS have done is taken away any chance for her to do that. We cannot assume that anyone affected this way cannot parent. If we do that, we will be one step away from "genetic cleansing" reappearing. Seriously. Show me the perfect mother, with plenty of $$ in the bank, in perfect mental health, and we'll be looking at a Tide commercial, not reality.
That is all true but, I had to focus on the 'here and now'. Not way down the road. It would be unfair, to make the child, the catalyst for further progress in her recovery from the abuse. That would make the child a pawn in daily crisis.
>4.) Dishonesty to this degree, not coming clean about your call to CPS, is going to ruin her, and if your only looking out for you, it's going to ruin you as well. That guilt is going to chase you forever, until you own up to what you've done. All of your excuses serve as a way for you to reason with yourself that you are in the right. I believe you need to re-examine this, truly. Look at the reasons that YOU chose not to parent, instead of the reasons that you blame her for.
I was not looking out for me, in reference to the call to CPS. I was looking out for the baby.
I was looking out for me, when, I went to the management company of the building we live in, and, told them to list me as 'Head of Household' in case, she took off, in the midst of a 'manic' episode.
I have been looking out for her, in all the medical things she has had done over the last year-and-a-half.
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