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Originally Posted By Lisa

marcia,
It sounds like you are searching for what is right for your family. I have a bio daughter. After secondary infertility, we felt we were meant to have only one. But, when Amanda was seven, we still couldn't get over the feeling that we wanted to love/give to a second child as we had with our first. 10 mths after starting to advertize, we had our son. We got him at 16 hours old.
Amanda went through a "honeymoon" phase with him, but now has the same sibling rivalry that I remember having as a child. She had to learn to share, to always look out for her little brother, and to put up with some of the unpleasantness of "big" sister. But she also adores him.
I have yearned at times for the "simpler" days. Not because I regret the adoption--I just think many new mothers of second children feel that way!
And, it did take me awhile to feel like Andrew's mom, but I cannot imagine life without him now. I love both of my children -- and they both feel so "natural" to me. Wish you luck. Please keep us posted!