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Go with your gut feeling. If you could not handle this child if she NEVER changed, then you should not finalize the adoption.
However, choosing to not finalize on the first possible date does not mean you have to have her moved. There's nothing at all wrong with telling her worker that you insist on living with her longer before making such a life-altering decision. Then you could live with her longer before deciding whether to finalize or disrupt.
If you can't handle her at all, then by all means have her moved. Is she in therapy? Talking to her therapist about your reasons might give the therapist more stuff to work with her about. Make a journal about her behaviors and what about them makes you unwilling to continue the placement - such information may be valuable for you in evaluating future placements, as memory tends to fade with time.
If you are not the mother who can handle this child at her worst, you would not be doing her a favor by continuing to try. Someone somewhere can handle her, and would consider it a blessing to be able to do so. If that's not you, then don't beat yourself up. If you can handle her right now but do not feel capable or willing to be responsible for her until she turns 18 years old, then you may want to give it more time without finalizing. Sometimes a gut feeling is all we have to go by, so we should not ignore it.
I wish you both luck.
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