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Thanks, that makes a lot of sense, better than the shock of all of a sudden "btw, you're adopted", and then all the fallout. Or the child finding out accidentally from someone else that doesn't necessarily have their best interests at heart.
What about the bmom? How do you deal with that? With telling them who it is? At least it's not a close relative, altho I hope the bmom and I continue with the relationship we've started.
She's almost like a daughter to me as it is.
thanks, this is all a whole new world to me. My ex was adopted, and remembered some of what it was like, it was a really bad situation and the adoption really was for the best for the kids. His bmom was 15 with 5 kids, if I remember correctly and was in no way prepared to deal or support them all. I helped him find her and was there for the reunion. I hope it's not at all like that with us.
Chey
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