[texasmom-to-be]

We're not matched yet, but have been talking to a woman whose situation has prompted me to ask this question of the forum, before we really have to deal with it.

If you know that a birthfather, with whom the birthmother is no longer romantically involved, is opposing the adoption plan, what should you do? My gut feeling says to ask for a meeting with the birthfather to discuss the situation and find out how serious he is about fighting the adoption and also talk about how open adoption can be beneficial to all parties. I think my agency, however (and I'm only guessing at this and haven't asked them point blank) would prefer I just deal with the birthmom and let them deal with the birthfather situation.

What do you think? I don't want to spend the first year of our child's life in a legal battle. Nor do I want to pay a huge amount of birthparent expenses, only to not be able to adopt this baby because the birthfather is asserting his rights to parent the child. Finally, I think that if a bio parent has the means and the desire to parent the child, they should have that right. Otherwise, are we not somehow stealing that child from them?