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OK,
It can be a very fast process. It depends on when you get on board.
First, parenting is a dual activity. No way should either one of you try to push the other into ready-time. It's possible you folks need to first think, if adoption is an opion then what kind.
A foreign adoption can cost as much as $30,00.00 (friends and their chinese infant) or even domestic from the CPS foster care system can get up to around $10,000.00
If you desire an infant, then foreign is about the quickest, most likely. Doemstically waiting for an infant can be years. As the birth mom has to pick you from the other families at the agency.
Our family of 3 kids and my husband, and myself waited until our kid were older. We knew we desired to go with the foster program and had no way of paying the kind of fees needed by a private agency. We went thru the state. Everyone has to take the foster/adopt classes on dealing with the troubled kids. You will know from that class, if you can handle a special needs child. We started classes in April 03, we got the home study and paperwork and classes all done by Nov. We actually got licensed Dec. 6th and had 2 boys placed Dec. 12th. They were nearly legally free as they have been in the system about 2 yrs. They are 3 and 4 now. Today we adopted. So it can be fast, but at any time before their placed is the time to backout. Once they're there, don't do it! You have to be ready. No one is ready for the diagnosis of cancer, but you adapt. you make due, and that's what the attitude has to be with these kids.
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