It's actually the mother... and the law states that if the mother is giving the baby up of her own free will, the tribe does not have to be called in. Apparently the ICWA is because of people going in and practically stealing Indian babies before the early 70s when it was enacted. I was told this by our attorney as well as reading it on the American Bar Association Website.
The mother also said that her tribe and her aunts had tried to get her to go to an adoption agency and adopt out her first one and she didnt' want to, so they will be all for this one being adopted out.
Thanks for your concern
Angela