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Wow...I am sorry that some of you are not getting the answers you had hoped for. I'm a birthmom, and my story is much the sam, only in reversed roles. I found my birthdaughter, but she seems to be uninterested in obtaining her medical records and/or heritage.
Don't give up. Like Vicrose says, many birthfamlies from the "closed" era have problems with contact. We were told to "put the feelings away," never talk about the adoption, and hide it in the pantry with the liquor. Very sad. I was one of the moms who never listened.
Keep in mind that is NOT the child we were ashamed of, rather OURSELVES. Birthmothers were viewed as "bad girls." Many of us were made to feel responsible for tarnishing the "good" family name.
My thought is that letters are often the most effective way to communicate. Letters don't put the instant pressure on anyone to answer at the moment. Often feelings are so jumbled we need a little time to assimilate...letters lend that time.
For those searching, don't give up. For those rejected, I feel your disappointment, but remember that it has nothing to do with you as a person, but a bad, ugly set of archaic systematic beliefs.
(((HUGS)))
~Deb
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