[jamie3]

I don't see anyway to get through this without therapy. I have to agree that he needs to be held accountable for his actions. Everyone in the world needs someone who will say to them, "What you are doing is wrong." I need it, you need it, and M. ,for sure, needs it. A neutral party could help a lot, especially since you and dh are not in agreement. If he lives in your house, he needs to be much more considerate of not dominating the electronics. We have an 18 year old girl who hangs out at our house and had taken over the computer and phone. We had to set limits with her. For about 3 weeks she quit coming over, but then she came back. Our family comes first and if the new kid can not have respect and follow the rules, we are better off cutting him/her loose.

If M is going to live at your house with the same rights as family he should have the same responsibility as family. At 18, he may not be the fragile child he would like to be. He sounds as if he is a master manipulator. Is he contributing to the family in any way?